I’ve been staring at the post button for weeks, drafting the start of many funny mediocre entries. The recent happenings involving the Duggar family made it painfully easy for me to rage-rant this. I forced myself to actually turn on Fox News tonight (yeesh) and watch the interview. I cringed, screamed, threw stuffed animals at the … Continue reading
Every year my friends talk about what they’re giving up for the 40-day lenten period before Zombie Jesus rises from the ground to fight Darth Vader Easter. Every year, I go on the same tirade about how giving something up for less than two months does not a good Christian make. As a kid, I’d … Continue reading
This above all: to thine own self be true, And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any man. Farewell, my blessing season this in thee! I’ve been on a theater tear lately. Hunchback of Notre Dame, Book of Mormon, Aladdin, If’/Then, and Something Rotten twice. Of … Continue reading
February has always been consistent for me- consistently horrible or great, and no in-betweens. The best changes in my life have come in February. Some of my biggest losses have also marked this frigid, unforgiving month. Thank you once again, Timehop. I left my job at STNJ in February and hopped shipped to the company … Continue reading
Carrie said it, and now Idina is singing about it. I saw If/Then with my Aunt last Thursday. First off, let me say that I don’t give two shits what you think about Idina Menzel. I don’t care if you hate Frozen (it’s definitely over-saturating every inch of life), and I don’t care if you … Continue reading
PTI is Pardon the Interruption. Not only is it one of my favorite ESPN shows, it’s also something I’ll use to break up my stream of consciousness with posts about Disney. Enjoy. Or don’t, whatever. Tune in next time for biting sarcasm and controlled rage. For those of you who aren’t familiar with Disney Vacation Club, … Continue reading
I love running. It is the best part of my life. Running in the cold is unbridled joy. Sometimes I like it more than I like eating cupcakes and binge watching TV. That wasn’t sarcasm, I swear. No. No- wait. Not the hose again. ANYTHING BUT THAT. You promised if I said I loved it … Continue reading
I despise running. Loathe. Abhor. I would rather jump into a tank of rabid, mating Great White Sharks while bleeding profusely after stabbing myself multiple times before lacing up and “pounding the pavement.” Fuck that. I permanently regret whatever drugs I was on when I signed up for the Princess Half Marathon. I must have … Continue reading
Like a moth drawn to a flame. More likely, like an adult human girl running towards a rampaging tire fire. Why are we always drawn to the things that destroy us? Not burn, destroy. Bugs aren’t burned by flames or bug zappers; they’re killed. Obliterated. Have you ever seen the YouTube video of a fly … Continue reading
You’ll get the above title reference if you’ve seen Stephen Sondheim’s musical Company. If not, go YouTube it. There’s a Neil Patrick Harris/Patti Lupone/Stephen Colbert (yeah, really) version that’s pretty awesome. I’ll wait. … For those of you that lack the musical theatre appreciation gene, Company is the story of single guy Bobby and his … Continue reading