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if/then, and the woulda, coulda, shouldas

Carrie said it, and now Idina is singing about it. I saw If/Then with my Aunt last Thursday. First off, let me say that I don’t give two shits what you think about Idina Menzel. I don’t care if you hate Frozen (it’s definitely over-saturating every inch of life), and I don’t care if you … Continue reading

PTI: DVC and the Polynesian Village and Bungalows

PTI is Pardon the Interruption. Not only is it one of my favorite ESPN shows, it’s also something I’ll use to break up my stream of consciousness with posts about Disney. Enjoy. Or don’t, whatever. Tune in next time for biting sarcasm and controlled rage.  For those of you who aren’t familiar with Disney Vacation Club, … Continue reading


I love running. It is the best part of my life. Running in the cold is unbridled joy. Sometimes I like it more than I like eating cupcakes and binge watching TV. That wasn’t sarcasm, I swear. No. No- wait. Not the hose again. ANYTHING BUT THAT. You promised if I said I loved it … Continue reading

The Anguish of the Longish Distance Runner

I despise running. Loathe. Abhor. I would rather jump into a tank of rabid, mating Great White Sharks while bleeding profusely after stabbing myself multiple times before lacing up and “pounding the pavement.” Fuck that. I permanently regret whatever drugs I was on when I signed up for the Princess Half Marathon. I must have … Continue reading

The Moth Complex

Like a moth drawn to a flame. More likely, like an adult human girl running towards a rampaging tire fire. Why are we always drawn to the things that destroy us? Not burn, destroy. Bugs aren’t burned by flames or bug zappers; they’re killed. Obliterated. Have you ever seen the YouTube video of a fly … Continue reading

Side by Side by Side

You’ll get the above title reference if you’ve seen Stephen Sondheim’s musical Company. If not, go YouTube it. There’s a Neil Patrick Harris/Patti Lupone/Stephen Colbert (yeah, really) version that’s pretty awesome. I’ll wait. … For those of you that lack the musical theatre appreciation gene, Company is the story of single guy Bobby and his … Continue reading

2015: Screw You, Back to the Future II

New Year’s Eve is quite possibly the most overhyped holiday of all time. As a 26-year old woman, your options are the following: 1.) Purchase and wear a sequined dress while spending lots of money at a price-gauged and creeper-ridden open bar. 2.) Purchase and wear a sequined dress, and also an adult diaper, while … Continue reading


Oopsies. Something's supposed to be here.

Circa very late 2014/very early 2015.

Law school dropout. Lover of all things Disney. Exploring the vast wildlands of New Jersey and recording every second.


  • We used to not sell fireworks in NJ and WHY DID THAT CHANGE 1 hour ago
  • RT @mousterpiece: Cutting through the bullshit, and he’s absolutely correct. 1 hour ago
  • RT @harrylitman: Shooter appears to be 18-20 years old. Drives home the ridiculousness of the Rs rejection of an assault weapon ban for 18-… 1 hour ago
  • RT @shannonrwatts: “The Highland Park parade had a heavy presence of police and fire vehicles…” How much more proof do we need before Ameri… 1 hour ago
  • I really hate my neighbors. Not looking forward to the next two months of nightly booms. 1 hour ago

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